LOVE, Kloudiia

This is the scenario: A girl won a challenge and was asked to pick a fellow contestant to share in her prize. The one whom she selected said, “I hope she didn’t choose me out of pity.” 

I almost choked on my water.

This girl, supposedly one of the top beautiful women in America (she’s among the top five contestants eyeing for the coveted title of “America’s Next Top Model”), actually believed that she got a prize out of sympathy? Why would anyone feel that way? Did she find herself pitiful? Or did she simply lack self-esteem?

If a person wallows in self-pity, then unknowingly, she has become the reason why her self-fulfilling prophecy will turn out to be true. She will be the cause of her own failure.

People with low self-esteem feel they don’t deserve to be happy and to be loved. Even when good things happen or when compliments are paid to them, they don’t know how to accept them graciously. Their distrust in their own capabilities cripples them. 

Yet, at the other extreme, the opposite happens. They boast, they show off, they put others down to make themselves look good. But deep down, they feel inferior. They think they will never be as good as others. 

But they don’t have to be this way! By simply choosing to believe in themselves, they’re as capable of realizing their potential as anyone else. 

There are many ways to boost self-esteem. You can start by setting small and measurable goals to achieve. Once you achieve a goal you set, do not allow yourself to brush it off just because it is not a quantum leap. Success can be achieved in small baby steps, not necessarily huge giant strides.

Gain your confidence along the way and use it to boost your self-esteem. Give yourself the permission to feel good about yourself. When you do something well and receive compliments for it, thank the person graciously and give yourself a pat on the back.

Make the effort to look good. Your pleasant reflection in the mirror makes anyone feel good, right? That’s what self-esteem is all about – liking and loving yourself! When you know you look exceptionally good that day, the feeling will manifest in you and bring out your confidence. Not to mention that keeping fit will definitely let you stay on top of things, too.

Hang around with positive friends. Their good vibes will energize you. Take in these happy molecules and store them in your mind, body and soul. Use that energy to help you get rid of any negative thoughts or undeserving emotions and install new empowering ones instead.

Last but not least, list your positive traits. Especially since you may not be even aware of your positive traits, ask your friends for genuine feedback on the three positive things they like about you. List them down and find the ones most commonly mentioned. Write them down in big, bold letters and stick them up at a conspicuous place. Stare at them for at least one minute every day and lock these in your mind. Let your subconscious mind do the rest.

If an apple a day keeps the doctor out, then a loving thought a day keeps your self-esteem healthy and without a pout!