LOVE, Kloudiia

Oh my, how easy it is to start a mother nagging. All it takes is probably a messed up room, a delayed chore to do, or maybe a late dinner or shower, and be ready to sit back and enjoy the reminders coming out at bullet speed, which will probably only stop when you start moving and get the things supposed to be done, done.

Why are mothers the only nagging ones? Don’t fathers nag too? Well they do, only a handful, and usually milder than what our mums are capable of. Having said all these, we should also be grateful that someone is there to remind you to take your supplements, to eat your meals regularly, not to shower too late etc, because these are done out of love. So, as much as we hate to be nagged at, we would still get our ass away from the couch and get moving.

This, however, would be an entirely different story if now, the mum is swapped for the girlfriend or wife. If you want your man to do something, tell him straight, and if it is urgent, give him a deadline. Make sure this deadline is communicated clearly to him, and he is agreeable to it. Then, when he didn’t make that happen by the due date, you can then remind him to do so. 

Do not keep reminding him umpteen times, hoping that it will hasten his speed. He probably wouldn’t even pay heed to whatever you say, and not just that, he may possibly do an auto-shut off when you open your mouth to say something again.

It could be a bad habit of his, and if you really think by breathing down his neck every waking moment when he’s at home will do the trick, think again. To get someone to get rid of a bad habit requires different straegies, and none of them should be nagging. Because this not only makes the person feels even more frustrated, it may elicit the rebel in him and do otherwise, just to spite you. I would propose effective communication instead, so that you can correctly diagnose the factors causing the particular behaviour, before you issue the right prescription.

Ultimatums do work at timesl, but please, if you really want to give him one, make sure you mean it. There are too many people who say things they don’t really mean, like if you do this again, I will do something else. But more often than not, it is used as a tactic to scare their partners. So, what is the point of issuing an ultimatum then? And the more you use this, the less effective it is going to be.

Say it only when you mean it. So if you don’t mean it, please, don’t say it. It serves no purpose, except to undermine your own credibility.

Lastly, when he’s done what you asked him to, remember to show him how thankful you are for his help. Show your appreciation. All of us, regardless of male or female, like to know our efforts are being appreciated. Just that, men may like it more, from their women in their lives! So girls, give it to them, be generous. You’ll be happy too, I promise!